Surface and Depth listening

Surface and Depth listening

Blog Entry 002 week 3
Surface listening is deriving literal meaning while depth is going deeper for underlying message of the speaker which may oppose literal meaning or totally have nothing to do with it.
Situation
A friend says with nonverbal showing curiosity “ I wonder what your house looks like”. Literally, the speaker might be asking for description. But deeper listening might show he is waiting for the listener to invite him to the listener’s house.

Posted by Wan Hani Arifah B0802457

Empathetic Listening

Empathetic Listening
Blog Entry 001 week 3
Empathetic listening could be divided by 2: Thinking empathy understanding the speaker cognitively whilst feeling empathy is understanding the speaker’s emotions. To put in simpler words, emphatic listening is listening to understand how a speaker is thinking and what he is feeling. Although one should put self in same shoe as the speaker, it is important for the listener to listen objectively with detachment. That is although one is to see from the same point of view as the speaker, one should not agree with everything the speaker said. Refer to the example below.
Situation
A friend complained that her son is extremely naughty and how she would hit the child to discipline him. As a listener, one may empathise the speaker of her problem but at the same time have the right to disagree what is heard.

Posted by Wan Hani Arifah B0802457

Self Fulfilling Prophecy

Self Fulfilling Prophecy
Blog Entry 002 week 3
Self Fulfilling Prophecy is when a person believes in something and making effort to achieve it. It is what happens when one expects a good thing as in the outcome and works for it and the result is as the individual expected. When the person sees the outcome and believe that his/her expectation is confirmed, self fulfilling prophecy existed. Vice versa if expectation is negative, the outcome will be negative. This theory is important for its effects on one’s self esteem self concept.
Situation
A cancer patient upon hearing she has cancer believes that if she fights it she could survive longer. It is proven statistically that such cancer patient has a greater chance of success to survive than those who initial believe is otherwise.
Posted by Wan Hani Arifah B0802457

Self disclosure

Self disclosure

Blog Entry 001 week 3
Self disclosure is a form of communication by which previously concealed details of the communicator are exposed or made available for interpretation, analysis or mental processing. In simpler words, self disclosure is giving away information of oneself. This could happen verbal and nonverbally and most of the time consciously.
The rewards of self-disclosure are many. By self disclosing, a person may gain more insight @ new perspective of oneself; it is part of Johari window that there are information about ourselves that we do not know but others know @ our blind self. Self disclosure is also how relationship begins and bonding takes place. Guilt could also be better dealt with when self disclosure is applied besides advanced level of communication could be achieved as the individual is better understood as in their unique traits cognitively and behaviourally ; what kind of person one is and what are the do’s and don’ts of communicating with them. However, the dangers of self disclosure are not to be taken lightly. Self disclosure practised without cautiousness may effect a person personally, professionally and even one’s relationships.
This is could be seen in US President Barrack Obama’s speech when he made a trip to a school 3 Wednesdays ago. In his speech he warns the audience of the lack of caution of self disclosing online. To reflect, lately there are many cases where employee’s are fired for information about themselves they put online besides potential candidates getting not hired; their disclosure in particular on the social networks.
Posted by Wan Hani Arifah B0802457

Asian Parents Are Not Crazy Or Are They?

Watch the videos below but please do watch out for the vulgar words used. And don’t forget to enjoy!


A continuous to the above video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwGdzqDdZwA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZINX44xaQXI

So what do you think of the video? Do you find it funny or rude? It really depends on you. If you ask me, I find it VERY funny indeed. Some things that he said might be true but the other bits and pieces are just made up for the sake of comedy. I don’t blame him anyway. It’s hilarious!

This video is actually made to portrait the perceptions of people other than Asians, what they think of Asian parents. Yes, it is true that most Asian parents are concern about their children’s education, they tend to be stricter on that area but they are not that extreme like what is showed in the video. Though some are?

Perceptions are sometimes made up out of nothing and some are planted in their mind since they were an infant. Like for example, a race have some ideas about another race, the way they talk, the way they think, the way the act and even the way they live. They were taught by their parents to be racist. Like the video I watched the other day, a Malay girl went to a shop with the intention of buying batteries. She was approach by a Chinese boy and the conversation goes like this.

Chinese boy : Apa you mau beli?
Chinese boy : Awak mau beli apa?
Malay girl : Battery 2A ada?
Chinese boy : Ada.
He gave her a baby milk bottle.
Malay girl : Ni botol la. (she giggled)
Chinese boy : Sorry. (while smiling and he hand her the battery)
Chinese boy : Dua ringgit.
Then she took a few candies in a bottle.
Malay girl : Ni satu berapa?
Chinese boy : Dua puluh sen.
Malay girl : Saya ada lima belas sen aje… tak cukup.
They where then interrupted by the Chinese boy’s mother.
Chinese boy’s mother : Hey, why the long conversation with the Malay girl?! (in Mandarin)
Chinese boy : I’m coming. (in Mandarin) (said with an annoyed face)
Chinese boy : Tak cukup tak payah beli lah!
Malay girl : (she smiled after making a slightly sad face) Sorry, terima kasih.

This may look like a meaningless story but it had made an impact on me. It shows me that the Chinese boy was actually taught not to have mingled with other races. He quickly replied her with a rude manner after being sounded by his mother.

What do you think?

Written by : Nur Afifah Bt Noor Azlan

Let's Make A U-turn

In relationships you will always have lots of misunderstanding and arguments. So, may I ask you a simple question? Have you ever been in a position where communication did not go as you wanted and you wished you could take back what you said or do a U-turn and reverse on what you have said, done or thought about? I certainly have.

Here is a typical situation that might have happened for many of us where it might be shrewd to do a ‘reverse’ and do things differently to create a diverse outcome for you, your partner and your relationship…

Try and imagine that your significant other, spouse or someone you love does something unexpected, not something that you would agree on, and when you get angry about it, the other person becomes very defensive trying to defend themselves, lashes out at you or withdraws. You get no where talking to each other, let alone understanding each other.

This example is one of the common problems in communication for young and old couples or any people who live or work together, and I bet that you have experienced something alike and would like to know how to resolve these kinds of problems.

Written by : Nur Afifah Bt Noor Azlan

Body language as a means of communication

There is many a time when people ignore and take body language for granted. Different body gestures are used to communicate to another party what one is really thinking or feeling. Some examples being frowns, which tell that someone is feeling low and sad or just not in a happy mood. Holding one's head with both hands shows that one is in a state of anguish, agony or amazement. Also the use of hands when explaining something ca be used to show the depth of what one's really talking about. These are just a few to mention amongst the many and is therefore important that we take time to notice these body gestures in our day today communications and interactions with people for we could hurt one's feelings or create wrong perceptions about oneself to others.

By Roy Chikumbi

Controversial Issues

Some of the topics I am going to touch on are controversial issues. Readers, I apologise in advance if I have directly or indirectly offended you or anyone who you know.

Topics of the day :

1.RACISM
- discrimination against other races
- most obvious between African American and others
- happens everywhere in the world

The following video shows this example of discrimination among Americans.


2. SEXISM
- discrimination against other genders
- Male vs Female
- again happens globally
- examples are such as F1 sports. No ladies are allowed to race among the men.

3. AGEISM
- discrimination against generally the elderly.
- happens mostly in companies
i.e. My mum's former company has this ruling that states that " All employees that are 55 and above are expected to retire unless they are under contractual agreement."


These are just some of the more common discrimination. We should practice being transparent and not speak or act in any way that discriminates others. It hurts when this happens to you. Practice being emphatic. This will strengthen all kinds of relationships.

Talked about by,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

why relationships need communication

When we like someone we do anything just to win their hearts.but once we do.we stop being sweet and find ways and words to keep them smiling everyday, that's when cheating comes in.keep in mind that both parties need attention to keep the relationship going as a result you need to give in 50% each in order to make the relationship strong.people wonder why distance relationship don't work its not because the partner luck interest in each other but its because you feel lazy to communicate as the result the other parties will do the same in due time it becomes a habit and you both start losing interest in each other.the key to distance relationship and just any relationship is communication even a simple message just to say hi can really help and can make it strong. In short all am saying is never give up in communication as its the only thing that keeps you going.

by roy chikumbi

ListeNinG diFferenCes

Listening differences among culture and gender are common in our daily life. For example, Malaysia is a multi-culture country. Majority of the nation is Malays, followed by Chinese and Indians. Although they are all staying in the same country, but they are actually communicate with each other in different languages because of the culture. Besides, nonverbal displays are vary among cultures such as those rules and regulations. For instance, the traditional clothes for Chinese is cheongsam, Malay is baju kurung and Indian is sari. All of these are part of the nonverbal displays.

In addition, listening differences also happened among gender. Men are more closely linked to the realm of the mind and reason, whereas women are more guided by emotion. According to report, women are more sensitive to some of the issues compared to men. They tend to be more sentimental in certain circumstances. Men are always act strong and not allowed to cry like women. Between men and women, there are not only different in norms of verbals and nonverbals but also different in feedback styles exist. Men may give the feedback based on reason more compared to women who give feedback based on emotion. However, even if women may be more emotional by nature than men, this does not prove that they do not have reason behind. Men and women should appear in equal sometimes.

By,

Liew Li Hui

You talk, I listen.

Situation:

You are upset with your some of your friends as they tend to ignore you during/in group conversations. You decided to talk to a few of them to try to figure things out. You asked them this question..

" Why do you seem to exclude me everytime when in group talks? "

And they replied...

Jenny : Sometimes I feel that too. That everyone is talking to everyone BUT me.
Charlie : We were not pushing you away. You just kept quiet the whole time and we just let you be.
Amos : Well, at times some of us wanted to have a private discussion and you happened to be there. We didn't want to be rude by by asking you to leave.

Many people faced this and it is not unusual. I face this too. When this happens, the three respondents are said to be ACTIVE LISTENERS. They interpret things differently and stated three different opinions.

This is good as it shows you are listening with empathy. Putting yourself into others' position. All of us should practice this more often than not. :)

Posted by,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

gOod LisTenEr

As a good listener, there are several stages for us to follow. Receiving comes in the first place. In this stage, we are actually decoding a message from the speaker. We ought to focus on the verbal and nonverbal signals from the speaker. For instance, where the speaker put his or her hand? What facial expression does the speaker show? All of these may indicate something special or give us a hint during the communication process. Try to avoid interruptions while you are listening. These might affect listener to receive or decode the message correctly.

The next stage is understanding. After we receive a message from the speaker, make sure that we are fully understand its content and meaning. If we failed to do so, we can ask the speaker to explain or rephrase the sentence in order to illuminate the speaker’s ideas. Different people has different point of view. Thus, try to put ourself into other's shoe will definitely help us to understand the person better rather than stick to our point of view.

Stage three is remembering. After we understand the message, we can sum up the message which including key information and store it in our memory. Besides, we also can categorize the central ideas and support it by taking the notes on that. The speaker will be very impressed if the words he or she said is being remembered by someone. This can be considered as one kind of respect to others. Evaluation on the message is stage four. After been through the first three stages, we should be able to evaluate the message regardless of biases, self-interests, and prejudices which may affect the originally of the message. The listener must think and analyze the message rationally.

Last but not least, responding places in the last stage. We need to give a respond to the speaker but not only keep listening from the beginning till the end of the conversation. By the way, we also can express our support by using verbal or nonverbal signals.
Overall, a good listener is someone who able to receive, understand, remember, evaluate as well as respond to the speaker properly.

By,

Liew Li Hui

iNterperSonaL & IntrApersOnal coMmuniCation

Human communication includes intrapersonal communication and interpersonal communication. Intrapersonal communication is a conversation with yourself while interpersonal communication is the interaction with a person with whom you have a relationship.

According to report, people are able to judge themselves better by intrapersonal communication. Talking to yourself and listen the words from your heart. Nowadays, people are paying more attention on their career and salary. They are not really having enough time to interact with themselves and enjoy life. As time goes by, they realize that life is meaningless and dull. Sometimes, they do not know what they are fighting for. Indeed, balancing between wealth and health is far more important than earning money blindly.

On the other hand, interpersonal communication is providing an opportunity for us to learn and reveal the strengths and weaknesses about others and own self. You are able to recognize other people better through the interaction. But, the condition seems to change in this modern yet realistic world. People tend to hide their true feeling by just entertaining who they meet up with.

In conclusion, intrapersonal and interpersonal communications play an important role in our daily life. Both of these methods act as a catalyst by improving the relationship between people.

Posted by,

Liew Li Hui

small group communication

“People, please choose your group member and discuss the question in a group,” teacher said.
“Sir, isn’t possible if I complete it on my own?” Student A raised up such question.

Have you heard of this question in your class? Or you are the one who ask this? Why some students are willing to do it on their own but not in a group? Is that any particular reasons behind?

Actually, discussion in a small group is part of the human communication skills. Since childhood, teacher used to separate us into a small group to perform some activities. The same concept applied when we are in the college too. When we start to involve ourselves in the working world, possibility for us to work together with others will become higher because teamwork is essential.
By working in a team, we can learn the skills to solve the problems, apply brain storming, and share knowledge yet experiences from people who come from different backgrounds. In order to achieve positive outcome, we need to cooperate with others to come out with the best strategy. Some people may think that he or she can do better without work with others. Definitely, there is no right or wrong of not being work in a team. Just depends on the circumstances and individual’s perception.

However, we have to learn the way to communicate effectively in a group. This may strongly bound the relationship within the group member and upgrade ourselves to become a knowledgeable person.


by.
Liew Li Hui

Birds And The Bees

Have you ever experience conflicts with the people around you? If you do, then communication that you converse among each other might be the factor of the argument. When speaking or conversing with another you should always consider their feelings and be vigilant of the words you are going to use. You must at all times put their interest before yours.

One of the main reasons of conflicts is miss communication. Without having a good communication, you can't have a bond with someone. If a person is conversing with someone and they found out that they have lots of the same interest, then they would hit it off right away which can also mean that they have a bond and they are connected in a deep conversation.

Confliction happens when two people misunderstood what another is talking about. They might misjudge another's intention while the other person does not intend to say what they actually mean. The words that came out from their mouth may not be the desire words they had in mind. Sometimes it is just blurted from their mouth without thinking it through.

Written by : Nur Afifah Bt Noor Azlan

Maybe, Maybe Not

My friend and I were really close.
He would be my shoulder to lean on
And vice versa
One day he started calling me names and being rude to me
I brushed it all aside thinking maybe it was someone else
Later only did I find out that it was indeed him who did all the things to hurt me
Why you may ask ?
I tried getting the answer out of him but he refused to tell
The only rational conclusion I could come up with is that he was heavily influenced by his other friends
Hence all the things he said and done

After all that has happened, my perception of him changed. I thought he was a one in a million true friend but it turns out he is just another spoiled brat.

Shared by,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

Don't Be Shy

Have you ever wondered how can one be so shy and timid? It’s not like we’re going to eat or hurt them. In fact, that is far from our intentions. Sometimes it makes no sense to you but I do in a way. Like most people, I too fell into the ‘shy’ group, though I have much improved over the years. There are many possible factors of shyness. People don’t just get shy all of the sudden for no reason what so ever.

People who have severe case of shyness may be dealing with very poor self-esteem or self-context; they don’t have confidence over themselves and they feel inferior when surrounded by other people. Their mind gets blank when they’re in a conversation and some might stutter when they talk. They get so nervous till they forget that they’re making a big fuss over nothing. If truth be told, they should have been acting calm and just follow the flow rather then stressing everything out.

Somehow or rather shyness might be mistaken with arrogance, whereas it is not. People often mistakenly assume that when a person avoids eye contact and is hard to make a conversation with, they are arrogant and stuck up. That kind of mindset should not be practise, not now not ever.

Being shy is not the end of the world but to overcome it takes 6 great steps.

1. When you get up in the morning go to the mirror and say out loud “I feel terrific! I feel terrific! I feel terrific!” Repeat this assertion at least 10 times in a day with eager until it embedded into your subconscious mind.

2. Dress up more often, wear pretty clothes and feel good about yourself. This will give you some kind of a feeling of confidence and self-esteem.

3. Take risk at least once a day so that it may help to conquer your fears. You can do everything, you’re growing in confidence as you learn more.

4. When you are in a conversation of two people or in a group, let them know that you’re shy. This will ensure them to include you in their discussion and stories.

5. Don’t be ashamed of rejection. Being rejected does not mean that you’re trash, it’s just that different people have different dislikes and likes.

6. Join any club, societies and activities that can make you feel excited and good about yourself.

As for the conclusion, it is essential to overcome your shyness, so that you can lead a stress free life and you can actually feel like a heavy burden has been lifted up.


Written by : Nur Afifah Bt Noor Azlan

Shhhh.... Please keep this a Secret ! ;)

A : B, I need to talk to you about something. It's quite personal and I would appreciate it if you keep this a secret. Please DO NOT tell this to anyone else. *shows a pleading facial expression*

B : It's alright. You can trust me. After all, what are friends for ? *smiles*

A : *takes a deep breath and starts blabbering*


Sounds kind of familiar to you doesn't it ? You have probably played both roles of A and B before.

This is called Self-Disclosure. You disclosed something (usually personal information) to someone whom you really trust and expects them to keep the secret safe, locked deep in their hearts. Of course just like everything in life, self-disclosure has its pros and cons.

Pros / Rewards / Benefits :

1. Better Self-Knowledge !
You will be able to know yourself better and in a new perspective or a whole new way. Seeing your problems and secrets laid out will enable you to further improve on your weaknesses and vulnerability. For example..

You like someone and he/she doesn't feel the same way. You are confused and hurt as you really like that person very much.


Telling this to your close friend will help you to decide what your next step should be in approaching this matter. You will also have the courage to accept whatever consequences with the help and support of your friend.




2. Ability to cope stronger
Since someone else knows your deepest secret, you would not have to carry the heavy burden of keeping it from everyone's knowledge. You will feel relieved and happier too. And sometimes you will be able to see the solution that has been right under your nose all these while. Besides that, you are able to discuss it with your friend and receive help from them through advises and suggestions.



Copyright © Image created by Jay Shah, University of Colorado, Boulder, 2005, using MS Clipart. Copyright (c) 2004 Microsoft Corporation, One Microsoft Way, Redmond, WA 98052-6399 USA. All rights reserved.


3. Communication between you both improves
Now that you both have something to share and talk about, you will go deeper into the subject. At the same time, you will learn in time about each other and how to best communicate effectively with one another. You will begin to make lots of phone calls or send short messages (sms) via handphone, chatting online, or just simply hang out somewhere to talk. Self-disclosure helps to bridge the gap and allow you both to talk about many things.






4. Relationships become more meaningful and might blossom into something more.
Over time, you and your friend spent lots of time together talking about life, problem, relationship, etc. The friendship will soon become very important to you. If both of you are young ladies or guys, you will be very close friends. However if you and your close friend whom you disclose countless personal details to are of the opposite sex, you might find yourself falling in love and having a relationship with your best friend.

So you see, self-disclosure can benefit you in so many ways. However, be careful not to reveal your personal information to just about anyone. Choose wisely on whom you confide to. :)

Blogged by,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

All about interview

Interview takes place especially when the moment people are hunting for a job. Communication that proceeds by question and answer is considered interviewing. It represents the interaction between people by communicating with each other. Do u you like to interview or being interviewed? I think most of us will say ‘NO’. Undoubtedly, we cannot deny that interviewing is actually one of the methods of self-learning, gaining counsel and achieving goals.

To do our best during the interview session, we need to be well prepared. Before it gets started, we need to do some homework. We can practice ourselves by asking such question like “Tell me about yourself”. This is one of the popular questions that might pops up in the interview session. Other than that, the first impression also plays an important role during the first interview. Have you ever seen people going for the interview by wearing pyjamas? So, dress up yourself with the proper attire.

Furthermore, be on time for an interview is a must. Don’t ever make the employers wait for you. This is some kinds of respect towards the interviewer. If possible, reach a little bit earlier than the appointment time. During the process, eye contact is essential since this may represent that the interviewee is actually paying attention and tends to seek a feedback form from the interviewer. Thus, maintain eye contact with your interviewer will help you out.

Sometimes, the result is out of the expectation like you might not get a job that you applied for at the end of the day. Just bear in minds that don’t give up easily. Learn from the past experience and apply what you learn on the next interview is helpful.

Posted by Liew Li Hui

Relationship and context Dimensions

Relationship and context
Blog entry 002, week 1
One of the important principles of communication is that communication involves content and relationship dimensions. According to the textbook, it can “exist on at least two levels ; a single message can refer to something external to both speaker and listener.....as well as the relationship between speaker and listener” (DeVito,2008) To demonstrate refer to the case below.
Situation
An elder sister just came back from meeting long-lost friends says to her younger sister
“ My friends said I looked thin... They said I’m prettier than the last time we met and they really admire me for my beauty and brains...” To analyse, we can see that the content dimension is that the elder sister is slimmer, beautiful and admired by her friends. The relationship dimension is that the elder sister is saying that the younger sister is fat, ugly and stupid compared to the elder sister. However, the relational part of the communication depends on many other aspects of message conveying such as nonverbal behaviour, intonation and choice of words.
To conclude, relational message perceived as personal attack or criticism is just an assumption if relevant aspects of decoding message is not fully utilised.
Posted by, Wan Hani Arifah Binti W Mohd Saleh (B0802457)

understanding each other

in order to understand each other,you need communication.communication is used in so many ways,we see companies join up together to form up a joint company but for these to work out properly the have to really communicate with each other.communication can be good and can also be misleading.for example during my secondary education i was told by my friend that i have failed in english and that was so supriseing to me because i knew what i was writeing and i knew i really worked hard for that exam,before even asking the teacher i went straight to my dad and told him the teacher has failed me in englishe just because he hate me. then my dad said we should go and see the teacher.when you reached in school and asked the teacher about it the teacher was very suprised and said roy you got a dinstinction in your exam the one who failed is loyd not roy,so my friend mislead me in the information he gave me as a result i had to apologise to the teacher because i was wrong and just concluded things.this is why communication is important because i was mislead with the information which was misleading.roy chikumbi

Relationship Problems??

WHY WHY WHY??

The main problem why most relationships don't work out these days are because of the lack of communication that is in the relationship. Relationships just don't work out just because that guy or girl is good looking or the prettiest girl on the block. Relationships are based on how well you can communicate with the person you love in many ways of expressing it. Many people fail to realise that having good communication skills between each other makes the relationship stronger and healthier.

Why healthier??

Well basically when you can talk to your partner it makes the relationship bond greater as in you can talk about anything and everything to your partner without having the feeling of guilt in hiding anything.

This explains why most Hollywood couples find it difficult to stay together for a very long time as they find it difficult communicating with each other after a certain period of time. This is because both partners are out working or travelling around the world where they do not have time to spend with each other and talk out things where they come to a conclusion that there is no more chemistry between them and hence they finally one day decide they cant live under the same roof. Being in a relationship is less about being in love but more about communicating with each other that expresses the love by itself.

Nonverbal and verbal communication

Verbal communication is the exchange of messages face-to-face.It is an efficient way of communication as it involves verbal exchange of information together with body languge and facial expressions,thus nonverbal communication.Nonverbal communication,as the name suggests does not involve the exchange of words verbally but the display of body language and facial expressions.If the appropriate body language and expressions are diplayed,nonverbal communication could also be very effective and indeed powerful in the case the wrong expressions are portrayed.Roy Chikumbi

What about Communication??

So what about communication??
Well communication is the main key into getting one salve into a conversation or even starting one. Communicating with someone using the right phrases and lines in our conversation are very important. Why? Basically it indicates us as a person on how we are conveying our message to the other party and how well that other party is taking it. So that is why in daily communication it is very important for one to have a good body language when having a conversation with someone or even in front of a lecture hall or any sort. This will give a good impression on the person when people look at them and tend to have a higher level of respect from others.
There are 2 kinds of communication which are:
(a)Verbal Communication

(b)Non-Verbal Communication

These communication styles are two different kinds of communication. The only similarity they have is that they both are a part of communication styles.

Verbal Communication is basically how you convey your message across to the other party whereas

Non-Verbal Communication is communicating without any speech but by using body language.

First Impression - Lasting Impression

Communication is hands down the most important thing needed to connect people to one another.

First impressions on the other hand are people’s first opinion of you. It is shown to be very hard to change even though it may or may not be true. It takes less than 3 seconds for other people to evaluate you when you meet each other for the first time. In this short of time, the other individual forms estimation based on:

• Your appearance
• The way you dressed
• Your body language
• Your demeanour
• Your mannerisms

All these examples are the list of things that affect a person’s judgement whether you are actually making an impact on him or her.

If it does give a good impact, then you are on the right track they might thing that you are in fact giving a good first impression.

If it doesn’t, then it’s a bad news for you as you did not make a good impression on them, they might not even consider being friends with you, and that my friend would be a total loss if you are actually trying to tackle that special someone.

Here's a video on making a good impression.

Written by : Nur Afifah bt Noor Azlan

Miscommunication

Introduction to Human Communication

This blog is one of the required assignments for the Introduction to Human Communication (FDHCM001) course continuous assessment. It is required of us students to post at least two posts per week regarding this subject. The following is this week’s entry blog, my full name as registered and student id.
Blog entry 001, week 1
Introduction to Human Communication chapter 1 is the study of human communication as in to understand communication and its application. Secondly, is to master the necessary communication techniques to be used to survive the real world ( during and after college). More importantly, it is to equip students with intellectual capabilities in communication in both broad and specific manner – that is for us to know our choices and have the knowledge to decide for the best way to communicate for given situation. An example of miscommunication and how it occurs based on past personal experience is reflected and explained below.
Situation
It was on Raya eve when I was about seven years old that this incident took place in my grandmother’s kitchen at her house in Kuala Terengganu. My grandmother was cooking “Nasi Himpit(pressed rice)” manually and was at the stage to press the cooked soft rice when she called my name and with her hand pointing to the kitchen drawer, said to me in Trengganu dialet “ haNii... che ambik rhajuk tu ke tok wang, tok wang nok wak tekang nasi eh” and I went straight to the drawer and took a wet, ugly, dirty and torn rag and passed it to my grandmother. She slightly jumped at the contact of the wet cloth and when she looked at what I had given her, she half laughing half screaming to the whole kitchen “ tuohnye budok (laughs at the top of her lungs) oghang suroh ambik rhajuk ye gi ambik kain burok (laughs and wipe tears from her eyes) guane nok wak tekang nasi ipek ngan kain burok (laughter at top of her lungs with the rest of my extended family that shook the wooden house to the ground.)”
From the above situation, it is clear that miscommunication happened as a result of language barrier ( lack of vocabulary to be exact), misinterpretation@wrong assumption and my lacking of critical and communication skills which is to adjust to my grandmother’s style of language/signal, had caused the miscommunication. What my grandmother had intended for me was to get a plastic bag inside the pointed drawer but I did not understand the word “rhajuk”, thus acted on the misinterpretation/ wrong assumption her nonverbal signal – the pointing of her hand that she wanted the ugly rag.The feedforward of the communication is when my grandmother called my name by stressing on the second syllable of my name. The social-psychological part of the communication was me as a granddaughter to my grandmother and the culture dimension is I had to obey my grandmother. Lastly the noise that occurred was semantic noise as I and my grandmother had different meaning system.
To conclude, without proper knowledge and skills to communicate miscommunication happens.
Posted by, Wan Hani Arifah Binti W Mohd Saleh (B0802457)

cOnFlicT ??

helo everyone... finally i sign in and post my first article..
i was wondering for a few days... what i need to post??
and i found that my brain was suffering in that period..
fortunately my brain come out with something today..
CONFLICT!!

First and foremost, what is conflict all about? Is it good or bad in the daily life? However, the meaning show in the dictionary is conflict occurs when there is a collision or disagreement between two or more parties. There are different kinds of conflicts happened in the real life, no matter it is through verbal or non-verbal communication. Conflict normally happen when one's opinion is opposed to another without any consensus is being achieved.

For instant, Vivian was quarrelled with her mother. Vivian told her mother that she would like to buy a new hand phone because her friends like to make fun on her out dated hand phone. She felt ashamed because of this incident. But her mother was not agreeing with her since the family do not want to spend too much on the unnecessary expenses. Without listen to the further explanation, Vivian was very angry and refused to talk with her mom for a week. In this circumstance, both parties also play an important role in solving a conflict. Indeed, they have to figure out the reason behind the argument but not insist to stay on with each other's opinion.

If both of them are sitting down and discussing with each other, will it be another outcome at the end of the day? Perhaps they may not get into this dilemma. If they are willing to discuss after fight, they should be able to analyze the whole situation more rationally and will understand each other better. Why Vivian's mom does not allow her to get a brand new hand phone? The truth is Vivian's father was having H1N1 and they just received the medical report from the hospital. Due to this matter, they need a large amount of money in order to pay for her father's medical fees in a moment.

In the condition mentioned above, can you actually judge the conflict is good or bad? Conflict had made Vivian being a considered daughter and learns how to show understanding and respect to her family. Sometimes, it really depends on the situation before we can conclude that conflict is beneficial in exploring somebody's mindset to bring positive result or causing both parties to get involved in the argument. When you learn something from conflict or mistake, it will become your key to success yet you can gain lots of good values which you can't find it easily in the text book.


By,
Liew Li Hui

Jon & Garfield

Garfield is hilarious isn't he ? However, what he said in the comic strip only holds true in his world. In reality, if this happens, it would only be a one-way relationship if none at all. If you analyse the comic script closely, you would see that there is a speaker and a listener. The speaker is of course none other than the furry orange cat, Garfield. The listener who is somehow able to read Garfield's thoughts is his owner, Jon.

There are a few form of human communication here. First would be the interpersonal communication. Garfield is somewhat communicating with Jon even though Jon didn't respond. This can be seen clearly when he greeted Jon with a Hello and a Goodbye.

The other form of human communication is the intrapersonal communication. Garfield is sort of speaking to himself, explaining his actions that he just performed. Since there is no one else in the last column of comic, it can be concluded that he is talking to himself.

Both forms of communication are practised everyday by us consciously and unconsciously. We interact with other people one-to-one, face-to-face, or in a group. When we speak to others via email, chat online, instant messaging, handwritten letters, on the phone, these are conscious communication. Examples of unconscious talking are like intuitions, gut feelings, whispering to ourselves silently, etc.

We can never run away from all these. It is part of us and our everyday lives. Without it, survival would be imensely difficult.

*Credits to http://community.livejournal.com/garfielddaily/177908.html for the Garfield comic strip.

Posted by,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

Footsteps into Human Communication

Hey everyone !

This is my very first blog post for human comm ! I am so excited ! :)
It has been a fun and interesting first two weeks.
It can only get better from here, dont you agree ?
Anyway, as a start I thought I should keep it light.

So, Human Communication. What is it ? According to the textbook, it states that it consists of sending and receiving of verbal and non-verbal between two or more people. In other words, it is just like a conversation you have with someone else or as a group like your family and friends. It involves 2 main things, verbal communication meaning speaking using your mouth and the other is your body language which is the expression of your body.

I don't think I have to explain much about verbal communication as most of us know what that means. Lets focus on body language. Body language simply means how you or rather your body react to certain things like your pose, gesture and movements of parts of your body.

For instance,
1. If you avoid eye contact with someone...
This probably means you are afraid or shy.

2. If you keep pushing your hair back...
This most likely says that you are bothered or troubled by something, frustrated,
nervous, self-conscious or bored.

3. If you sit cross-legged...
This may suggest you are confident or flirty.

4. If your writing is small...
It might indicate you are uptight, likes to be organised, dislikes changes or neat.

That's all for now. I will update soon with my second post of the week ! Till then, take care ! :)

By,
Mok Lee Ling aka Melanie. =)

Give A Speech!

This marks my first post on this blog and I declare it to be open!

In Human Communication we are taught on ways and types of communicating. Public communication or public speaking is one of the many examples. If asked, would you go up to a stage and give a speech? More than 80% of the human population will answer NO they will not. This is quite normal as I myself would not dare to stand alone on the big empty stage and present a speech out of the blue.

But one may ask, what is there to be afraid of? There are lots to be afraid of. We fear people’s judgement of us or we might humiliate ourself in public or we are just too shy to open our mouth. No matter what the reason is, we must all learn to fight that feeling, shake all the bad vibes away and give our very best.

Here are some tips that might help you to improve your presenting skills.

a) Know

• You should know the needs of your audience and your materials thoroughly.

b) Body Language

• Standing, walking or moving about with appropriate hand gesture or facial expression is preferred rather than sitting down or standing still.

c) Speak

• You should speak to the audience, listen to what they have to say, respond to their response, adjust and adapt to the situation.

d) Humour

• Add in funny jokes related to the topics as much as possible in appropriate times to keep the audience interested throughout the entire presentation.

Written by : Nur Afifah Bt Noor Azlan